This Is What I Call Love

My Short Stories


Four years abroad were just like being at hell without seeing her. When I last met her, she was as beautiful as ever with a little sorrow at her heart. Even at that time, I knew that she had been engaged. I could not prevent it. I could read her mind then, she had not given her consent deliberately. She was forced to do so -- I am really unable to think of those things - that past. I knew in another hour, I would see her. Hope she has not changed her home. She had mailed me her marriage invitation which contained her address – in fact her husband's. I can not imagine how exactly I felt when I received that mail. Thought I had a strong heart..!! But...!!
Might be she has a child or two now. As I had expected, in about 45 minutes I reached the city. I called for an auto. The auto man had no trouble in taking me to that place. It was a very big house. I walked along the lawn and I knocked the door. Soon it was opened by a small girl – probably three years old. She was wearing a jacket and a skirt sort of a thing. She looked at me from top to bottom. “Whom do you want?” I suddenly had a doubt. I looked on my sides to find a name board. I confirmed that I was in the right place. I replied, “Can I see Nivedha?” “Excuse me – Mr. – She is my mom and I can not stand anybody disrespect her.!”
These words struck my heart like an arrow. “Excuse me – Mr. - Prof. Menon is our Professor and I can not stand anybody disrespect him.” “I am terribly sorry Nivedha”
“E…Excuse Mmmr!!” “Sorry again – Ms.Nivedha” “That’s better Mr. Siva” How can I ever forge those first words with her!
“I am terribly sorry Ms….” “Sivaranjani” “Can I see Mrs. Nivedha?” “That’s better. Please come in.” She ran off into the house. Yet I could hear her, “Mom! Some guy’s come looking for you…” It was then I heard her voice. “How does he look like? Did you ask his name?” “Oh…I forgot” Again the girl reappeared. But this time her mother followed her. It seemed to me as if she was busy at her work. Before looking at me she wiped her face with her hands and checked her face in the mirror, set her kumkum right and then raised her eyes at me.
“What’s your name?” But Nivedha replied her question looking at me, “Ranjani, get in. I know him.” Our eyes were fixed. Then Ranjani again starred at me from top to bottom and ran into a room. It was me to speak first, “H…How are you?” “Fine...” She asked me to sit on a chair. I took that seat. She asked me the same question. I gave her the same answer. “Where’s your husband?” “H... He’s gone to work. You have not seen him right? He’s right behind you – I mean his photograph.” I turned back. There was a single wallpaper – a photograph of Nivedha and her husband. Even the hall was full of small photos of the family. “Neatly maintained”, I remarked. “That’s my job – it can’t be otherwise just because I have been with you for a very long time. I should have mastered atleast some of your special arts.
I thought of telling her, “I still love you and nobody can really stop me from doing that.” But I could not do that. I knew her very well. She would not … Yet she would not have, indeed could not have thrown me out of her heart.
“Just a minute, let me bring you your favourite drink – dry coffee. You should not have been able to get that in America.” She was right. She disappeared into the kitchen and Ranjani reappeared with a photograph in her hand. She was silent first and then she whispered something into my ears, “Are you Mr.Siva?” “Yes!” “Please come with me” She led me into the inner most sanctum of that home and then gave to me a paper- a letter.
“My papa had told me that you would definitely come here one day and he had asked me to give this to you. Mom does not know about this. So please keep this a secret.”
I got that letter from her and started reading it in my mind.

“Hi Siva,
Think you know me. And I know very well about you. Nivedha has told me everything. I still have guilty feeling that I have taken something of yours away from you. I really don’t know if I will be able to meet you in person and apologise for that. That’s why I am writing this for you. My daughter is quite matured and clever you know – just like Nivedha! Think she should do this perfectly – I have given her your photograph. Nivedha has become a part of my family and it’s my duty to look after her. But I pretty well know that I won’t live long enough to do that to perfection . You see I need your help. I think you understand what I mean. She is yours. She needs someone after me and it would be the best if that someone is you –the one who has carved a temple in her heart. So please…
Sorrily
Shravan.”

Should all this happen to my Nivedha? She must have belonged to me. Tears flowed down my eyes. I turned back and there she was standing looking at the paper in my hand. There was no need of any explanation. She understood that I had become aware of the fact that her husband had died. She knew what I had in my mind. We walked together to the hall. She was the first to speak, “Siva…You see …don’t ask me to do that alone. I am prepared to do anything for you. But not that…” I really understood what she really meant by “that”. “But is it not my responsibility to…” “Who said no – I pretty well know that you still love me …Come and see me and my child often – help us however you can – nobody’s going to stop you.” “But…?” “What But…? Have you ever thought of your marriage??” It was true. I had decided to marry never again. Again?? She continued, “Why don’t you try leading a normal life?” “But without…” “Without me…OK! Suggest something… except “that”” Something struck my head. I would be the most pleased one if I had her near me always. So I said, “I’ll do what you say…but you must live next to my door always…under my..” “Yes I understand…Do you mean you shall marry some one if I agree to this” With some disagreement, I said, “Yes” “OK! I am ready” That was it. She had achieved what she wanted- which really looked impossible a few moments ago…!!
Should all this happen to my Nivedha? Tears flowed down my eyes. I turned back to check if she was not watching me. I just remembered our conversation…- her reply to my question about her husband – how she said me to look behind. How she looked into the mirror as soon as she came out of the kitchen! How great her husband must have been to replace my position in her heart. Really great – the letter – a solid evidence for that. I pocketed it and walked to the hall. I started looking at those pictures carefully. By that time she had brought me my favourite drink. Several thoughts ran through my mind as I drank that coffee. She spoke, “Shravan used to say that he wanted to see you. He will be very much pleased when I tell him that you had come here to see me. Can you really wait till…?” I listened to her carefully looking at those photographs. They could really explain me something that even Nivedha could not have – “How much she loved her husband!” I had carved a temple in her heart but how can I describe what he had done… Indeed he had not died. He was living right there in that place along with his beloved wife and cute daughter. And I could notice that she saw her husband everywhere in that home. She was leading a peaceful life with her husband there. I did not want to disturb that life of hers. I did not want to disturb her happiness in such a life. I kissed Ranjani on her forehead and bade good bye to them forever.